Yes. We can go about our daily lives and not notice that someone important to us is stuck in old patterns and beliefs that we have already moved beyond. If we are on a path of growth and development while they are content to stay where they are or regress, it can be a problem. We love them dearly and yet it feels frustrating to be around them.
If we try to talk to them about it, they either don’t get it or get hurt or angry—even if we approach the subject in a gentle and loving way. If we express anger because of frustration with their stuck-ness, it creates a further wedge and does not really solve the issue. If we dumb ourselves down just to get along, it also doesn’t feel good.
It can be very disruptive when we are growing, learning, and expanding into new horizons, while “the other” is mulling around in old patterns. I had a friend for over 35 years who was on my level of consciousness, adventure, and passion for life when we met. Then she got married and took on endless responsibilities of house maintenance and drudgery. She became consumed by houses, repairing them, cleaning them, and all sorts of endless activities that were not in the same creative mode that she had displayed to me for so many years in the past. They made her cranky, distracted, and anxious—testy and difficult to be around.
I just didn’t buy into why she had to live this life of restlessness and striving while she neglected her Soul. So you can say I outgrew her. It was not a happy experience to feel as we parted. I don’t think she had any insight into why it happened. She was completely unconscious. And I had also been unconscious as it happened through the years. But when I finally woke up, it was over.
If we try to talk to them about it, they either don’t get it or get hurt or angry—even if we approach the subject in a gentle and loving way. If we express anger because of frustration with their stuck-ness, it creates a further wedge and does not really solve the issue. If we dumb ourselves down just to get along, it also doesn’t feel good.
It can be very disruptive when we are growing, learning, and expanding into new horizons, while “the other” is mulling around in old patterns. I had a friend for over 35 years who was on my level of consciousness, adventure, and passion for life when we met. Then she got married and took on endless responsibilities of house maintenance and drudgery. She became consumed by houses, repairing them, cleaning them, and all sorts of endless activities that were not in the same creative mode that she had displayed to me for so many years in the past. They made her cranky, distracted, and anxious—testy and difficult to be around.
I just didn’t buy into why she had to live this life of restlessness and striving while she neglected her Soul. So you can say I outgrew her. It was not a happy experience to feel as we parted. I don’t think she had any insight into why it happened. She was completely unconscious. And I had also been unconscious as it happened through the years. But when I finally woke up, it was over.
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