My spiritual blog & articles - My Spiritual Coach

What factors contribute to people becoming more "spiritual" as they age? Is it a result of maturity or other influences?

12/2/2024

On one level, age has nothing to do with spirituality. I have met very evolved spiritual beings who were young children. My understanding is that we are all born with an inherent spiritual sense and cosmic consciousness. Then life experiences and the development of our ego minds cause us to cover over this light like a lightbulb covered with masking tape.

We lose our way to the Soul within and think we must survive at all costs as time goes by. People hurt us, we are in unavoidably painful situations. This causes many to form protective callouses that surround our inner light. If these callouses grow too thick, age only forms a greater barrier to spiritual understanding as we pile them on through the years. Then we are amazed that a person has lived so long and is nothing but an old grouchy, self-righteous, bitter, and regretful person who envies the young and puts them down for their ideas while they are still growing.

But if we maintain our connection to the inner light that is a reflection of the Source of All, then age is definitely a plus. Older people have a chance to experience more and see how it all turns out. We see that things we worried about never happened. We know we are capable of handling whatever comes up. We see life as a huge adventure, with moments of joy, moments of pain and that they alll pass. We are emotionally mature and don’t have tantrums because the world doesn’t bend to our wishes.

We have enough experience to see that things clear up over time. Or we accept them. Or we walk away from them. It’s not a big emotional rollercoaster and drama production. We know that we don’t have that much time left in the body so striving to fix things that are beyond our control or trying to create a spectacular life that fulfills our fantasies is really pointless. We can relax and let life unfold and take delight in all the manifestations of physical reality.

Society, as usual, has it backwards. Being older is the best time of life—as long as we are fit and maintain contact with our inner light, or Soul. Otherwise, we are a mass of aches and pains, stiffness, insomnia, poor digestion, facing some horrible form of death. If we don’t know we are more than the body—that we have a body but are Eternal Soul watching the show—then age is no advantage at all. Thus the time-worn expression, “There’s no fool like an old fool.”

Would you rely on science or spirituality to control important elements of the universe and life?

10/12/2024

The Universe controls us. Very little is actually under our control. Our circulatory system, our beating heart, our digestion, almost anything inside us is beyond our control. If I asked my pancreas to stop secreting pancreatin right now, what would be the result? It is beyond my control.

The only thing inside us that we can control is our thinking (sometimes our breathing to a certain extent). And even our thinking runs wild most of the time. What we can do is rely on spirituality to give us techniques and methods to manage our thoughts and feelings.

If we have no control over most of what goes on inside our body, do we presume to be able to control the fundamental laws of the universe outside of us? They are just as ungovernable as our gall bladders. In truth, Universal laws control us. It’s not, and never will be, the other way around.

Science can provide answers to question about how physical laws, such as thermodynamics and gravity work. It can provide psychology, which discovers how the mind works. But when it comes to the Soul, only spirituality gives us access. And spirituality is not about fighting or controlling the way things are. It is peacefully accepting that we are in the hands of forces much greater than our minds. We go with it in awe and wonder and don’t try to control it.

Can a person with a low IQ still achieve spiritual development and enlightenment? If so, what are some ways in which they can achieve this?

9/16/2024

Intellect and cognitive development have nothing to do with the enlightened state. Thinking that we are highly evolved intellectuals can actually be an impediment to spiritual understanding. We think we are so smart and have all the answers, or at least educate ourselves to be cerebral and worthy of self-esteem and the admiration of others. But the intellect comes from the brain. Enlightenment comes from the heart and gut.

A low IQ person may have a highly-developed heart center. This may come from a state of grace. They may be gifted in the inclinations of the heart, which is the center of love, peace, and trust in the Universe. Heart-centered people do not have to go through exercises, practices, and meditations to achieve spiritual development. They are already there. It is just a matter of discovering it and letting it flow. They don’t offer as much resistance to the inspiration of Divine Intelligence. They don’t examine it. They go with it.

I once had a trainer in the gym who had Down Syndrome. He used his intuition and spiritual perception to design the perfect exercises for me. He was also an athlete in the Special Olympics. He was in peak condition and inspired me to new heights and fun in working out. It was never a struggle with him. Even though it was about physical achievement, it was also a current that passed from his heart to mine, making a lasting impression. I still use his techniques. The total experience stays with me to this day.

Low IQ doesn’t mean that a person doesn’t have natural intelligence that comes from channeling the underlying intelligence of at the core of all creation.
Not standing in the way of the abundant flow of the Source Energy of the Universe is a more effective way to receive enlightenment that packing our brains with book-learning and cleverness of thought, meditating for hours in uncomfortable positions, or any other activity that people do in search of enlightenment.

I am not diminishing the wonders of the developed mind and its manifestations. But if we look around us, we will see that our high IQs have not led to happiness or to the health of the planet. So let’s not put too much stock in intellectual development as a path to enlightenment.

Is it possible to return to a "normal" life after having a spiritual awakening, or does it permanently change your life?

9/15/2024

After my spiritual awakening dawned on me, I dropped out of society. All the things people strove for to “make it,” to find relief from the constant turmoil of the human ego-mind, were meaningless to me. I didn’t want what other people wanted. I wanted the “Peace of God that passeth understanding.” And I wanted to explore the spaciousness of the background instead of being focussed solely on the foreground.

I owned nothing for 5 years, including the clothes I wore, which I borrowed. The only money I had was from odd jobs for the moment. Most of the food I ate, I grew. I devoted myself to living in the light of the Divine Consciousness of the Universe. I studied the great spiritual masters and lived in inspiration. That isn’t to say I didn’t experience physical difficulties but I felt courageous and free.

Yet certain necessities of survival and family matters propelled me back into the “normal” life. Circumstances made having a regular income a must at that time. Though dropping out was appropriate for me before, now it was appropriate for me to bring the context of enlightenment into the regular workaday world. It brings to mind the old Zen Buddhist saying, “Before enlightenment, chop wood, carry water. After enlightenment, chop wood, carry water.”

The meaning of the quote is that:

Enlightenment does not change your life. Life will still go on being life, with pain, sorrow, loss, suffering, with happiness and good times too. You just view it in a different context and don’t take it personally. You are not its puppet. You are the observer.
Enlightenment is not about fireworks and wild ecstasy. It is simple and has to do with performing simple things mindfully. You are living in the now and not doing everything because you think the future will bring you salvation from your present unease. You are not putting yourself on display as a paragon of anything.
Before enlightenment, you still needed to chop wood for the fire. Now most of us don’t chop wood on a daily basis, but when this proverb came out, that is what we did if we wanted a fire. The fire didn’t appear magically when we wanted it. It’s the spirit in which we do any task that is the underlying hallmark of enlightenment. Also, even if we don’t go down to the river now to fetch a bucket of water, our bodies would perish if we didn’t get the water for ourselves from the faucet or the grocery store.

No, I never returned to “normal” after enlightenment swept me away. Yet I still look and behave life a normal person. I am by no means a perfect saint. I laugh at my weaknesses and laugh at my strengths as well. And I don’t take credit for any of it. I am grateful for the gift!

Can someone who was previously mentally ill become enlightened through meditation or other methods? Are there any examples of this happening?

7/30/2024

Mental illness is a large topic. Some pundits, such as R.D. Laing, see mental illness as a sane adaptation to an insane world. But if you have been around the mentally ill who exhibit the inner torment that most of us hide, you will recognize that they are being run by a maladaptation that disconnects them to the reality and behavioral norms we have agreed upon.

Enlightenment is precisely not being run by the smaller mind, which is subject to all kinds of injuries, chemical imbalances, and diseases such as Alzheimer’s. Enlightenment is alignment with a higher, more transcendent, organizing Intelligence that is far beyond the capacity of the human brain and its hard wired propensities.

To contact this higher Intelligence, we must clear the static of the obsessive human mind. We can use it but not let it use us. Meditation has shown through the centuries that it is a viable path to observing our disturbing thoughts and rise above them like a balloon. Then we can get into that alpha brain wave state that clears out the dust balls of memory and fears about the future. Scientists have studied the brain waves of consistently meditating monks and have found beneficial changes in the structure of the brain itself.

But the first step, regardless of meditation or any other method, is the burning desire for enlightenment. The burning desire to rise above the chattering mind and its desperate need to survive at all costs is a must. If a previously mentally ill person needs, with all their being, to find inner peace and live an orderly, joyful life, it’s of primary importance to make the effort.

Enlightenment isn’t for everybody. It is not democratic. If it happened for everyone, this planet would not be in the state it’s in, with crimes against humanity and malignant disruption of the environment. Yet everyone is capable of it too, if they deeply desire it with a sincere longing that is like a passionate love affair. The Universe will find a way to bring them the answers they are looking for.

Extremely self-absorbed people who have to deal with personality disorders such as Narcissism often do not have the insight into their behavior and thinking patterns that cause so much grief to them and all around them. But enlightenment is open to everyone who shows the slightest bit of passionate effort. It has to come from a sense of responsibility for our lives. We don’t let the insane mind put us in a place where others need to care for us or put us away and structure our days. However, if there are structural and chemical diseases involved, the prognosis for enlightenment is that it won’t happen this time around.

Not everyone is equipped to climb Mt. Everest. Not everyone is capable of being an international chess master, regardless of the amount of training. Enlightenment is like that too. You have to be ready for it. It is not attainable through magic formulas or wishful thinking, or a step-by-step process. You have to know what it is to be drawn to it. Unfortunately, mental illness, because of its centeredness on the little me and its fearful, disorganized mind, presents a large roadblock to enlightenment in this lifetime.

What is the purpose of spirituality if there is no tangible outcome after reaching enlightenment?

7/21/2024

Spiritual enlightenment is a way of looking at and experiencing life. It is not goal-oriented about achieving anything in the physical world. It is about going deeper into our consciousness to acknowledge the background of our lives instead of the activities that consume our days.

Humans think that achieving tangible outcomes matters. Or we may think spirituality will ensure our comfortable place in the afterlife. Spiritual enlightenment has nothing to do with our getting things, getting things done, or ensuring our survival.

Humans have been producing tangible outcomes for centuries. In the process of all this activity and getting things done, we have destroyed each other and huge sections of the planet. We think getting things done is progress and it will be profitable too. For example, the highway systems that cross the world now. They are great conveniences for getting things done. But what has happened to all the forests and farmlands, mountains that had been blasted through? They will never be the same again as we continue to pave the land and use it to get things done.

The byproducts of these progressive highways are pileups, traffic jams, gruesome fatalities, shredded nerves, road rage, self righteousness and condemnation of other drivers.
Enlightenment does no harm. It does not transform matter into other forms of matter. It acknowledges the background that is always there from which all the physical manifestations emerge and into which they disappear. It is a peaceful state that remains, even if on the surface our emotions have been ruffled.

The only purpose of enlightenment is to relieve human suffering. That is how the Buddha defined enlightenment: The end of suffering. If we want to go through life kicking and screaming, resisting what is and being ungrateful for its multifaceted magnificence, be my guest. But if we need to enjoy life, spiritual enlightenment is the way to go because it is based on eternity. It cannot be destroyed while all else passes away.

How does a person's spiritual enlightenment appear to others, such as their friends and family?

4/24/2024

For friends and family, it depends on the level of their own enlightenment. For they will not recognize it if they do not have the capacity for enlightenment themselves.

They will have to understand that enlightenment doesn’t mean that you are a saint that never makes mistakes and lives a faultless life. They will know that enlightenment is a context in which we view life as a manifestation of Eternal Energy creatively interacting in an endless network of magnificence. It is a state of awe and worship and complete trust that everything is perfect just the way it is. And they will know that you know this.

I was very fortunate, because my mother recognized my spiritual awakening when I was a small child and nurtured my mystic’s path. Though she taught me practical things, she also admitted that she had not attained the level of where I was in grasping the nature of the cosmos. Otherwise, I acted just like a normal child—getting into mischief and rough play.

Yet it soon became obvious, when I went to boarding school at age 11, that other children sought me out for comfort and advice. They would come into my room at night (after lights out). They were frightened, feeling alone and unloved (for there are no parents in boarding school to tuck you in and read you a story at night) and I would talk to them about life and just help them feel at peace.

This continued on into other boarding schools through high school (and college). The students made appointments with me after school to talk over their problems. These were the people who recognized enlightenment and it struck a note in their Soul. This recognition was not because I was a well-behaved girl. I had been expelled, suspended, and routinely punished for my antics. So it was not because I was an exemplary model of perfect behavior.

But if people are not on the wavelength or are just not interested in answering the deeper questions of life—if they just want to survive and have no curiosity about why—they will not acknowledge or even notice enlightenment. Often they will fall for flamboyant and false spiritual “leaders” who are more interested in self-aggrandizement than worshipping the power and glory of Life. They want the enlightened being to wear special costumes and do all kinds of entertaining rituals.

If they see a person like me, they won’t tune in. Because I am not trying to be anybody special. I don’t want to form large groups around me and have people kiss my feet (as happened often when I walked through India). Yet, regardless of their relationship to me: Family, friends, or just someone in line at the grocery store, if there is a spark of enlightenment within them, they will see it in me.

Does a person's past lives become irrelevant during a spiritual awakening?

2/16/2024

The significance of knowing about our past lives lies in our understanding of ourselves as Eternal Souls. Whether we were beggars or royalty is not as significant as how much of the loving energy we expressed. More important. in terms of karma, is if we inflicted intentional cruelty on anyone or anything. For the Universe is perfectly balanced and no one gets away with anything.

It can be useful to know the patterns of our past lives because they often shape our choices, likes, loves, and which people we attract into our lives this time around. These are our individual colorations, quirks, and talents—illustrated by Mozart composing perfectly complex symphonies at age 5. But in terms of our Eternal Soul, all these talents and abilities are like the individual grains of sand on the beach. Fascinating and unique, yet part of the whole mass of sand.

Spiritual awakening includes the deep feeling in our guts and hearts that we have passed this way before and encountered some of the same people. And therefore knowing about our past lives is a key to figuring out why certain patterns keep occurring or what impels the choices that we make. Yet, after all of these many lives our Souls have cycled through, we remain the One Eternal Soul.

So it is not irrelevant to acknowledge that we lived before in a different body when we live the awakened life. It is just part of the process of awareness that this body is not who we are and we have had many of them before this. In the case of Twin Souls, the same Soul resides in two different bodies in the same lifetime. Our Souls are eternal and do not perish when the body goes away.

What does it feel like to be without a mind or ego?

12/18/2023

A student once asked His Holiness the Dalai Lama, how does he handle his ego. The Dalai Lama asked him to explain what the ego is. After the student explained that it was a level of consciousness that we must be special. That we must survive no matter what. That we must make ourselves better, especially better than others. This ego—tendency is hard-wired into the human mind. It causes unrest, unease, discomfort, and a lot of anxiety about the past and the future.

The Dalai Lama’s response was they didn’t have that concept in his practice. He really didn’t know what the ego was because he never felt he was someone special. He didn’t feel the overpowering need for his physical presence to survive. He said in The Book of Joy:

“I always consider myself personally one of seven billion human beings. Nothing special. So, on that level, I have tried to make people aware that the ultimate source of happiness is simply a healthy body and a warm heart.”

When he said this, the statistics were at seven billion. But now it is more like 8.5 billion people on the planet—all thinking they are special, with their dreams, ambitions, and goals to make something out of themselves and make the world a better place. The Dalai Lama doesn’t have such lofty aspirations. He’s very simple. Alleviate suffering in yourself and others as much as you can. That’s it. You don’t have the be the holiest, most self-sacrificing monk in the world either. Or come here to fix the world that was doing fine before we meddled in it.

Imagine that you are a cat curled up by the fire, or a fish swimming smoothly through water. Do you have the kind of mind to create worry and upset? No. All animals are without the ego mind. So if you want to know what it feels like not to have an ego-mind, picture yourself as any animal, plant, or rock in nature—living harmoniously, dying or dissolving when the time has come, with no struggle involved.

The azalea isn’t saying, “I hate that yellow daisy over there. Yellow should be banned in nature. And look at how fresh and young that daisy is too, while I’m on my way out. It’s not fair. I should live forever. Because I’m special and above all others. Maybe, in my next life, I’ll reincarnate as an orchid.”

The deer isn’t saying, “When will I get married? I don’t want to be the one deer left behind in the thousands of herds.” The street mutt isn’t envying the pampered lapdog and planning a rebellion against the forces of nature that landed her in the streets. The snake isn’t protesting about not having legs and demanding compensation.

Imagine yourself as part of nature (which you actually are), with forces acting on you beyond your control, and you will know what it feels like to be without an ego mind. It is the only time, as a human, that you will feel free.

What is the difference between Buddhists who believe that there is no end to enlightenment and those who say that everyone eventually becomes enlightened?

11/5/2023

The way the human mind interprets “enlightenment” is that it is an end point. Like the end of a story that has a beginning, a middle, and an end. Once we are enlightened, then all life is solved. We won't have any problems, there will be eternal peace of mind (an oxymoron), and we will never experience suffering again.

But enlightenment is not an end point. It is a context in which we view all of life and death. It is a space from which we perceive all the manifestations of life. It is not a state of perpetual bliss and ecstasy of escape. It is ability to be in the present moment no matter what is happening or what we are doing. That is what enlightenment was to Buddha and that is what he revealed.

He also taught how to live so the present moment reveals itself to us in profound ways that enriches our inner being, our Souls. He understood that our Soul is always and eternally Here and Now. The future, or enlightenment in the future, is not going to bring us anything. It is all about the Now because the Soul is ageless and doesn’t have anything to do with time, or any of the other human ways of measuring experience.

Let’s look at the word “believe.” “Believe” means we are willing to follow because we are not sure but it makes sense to us. “I believe it to be true,” is different from “I know it to be true.” We believed in Santa Claus and the tooth fairy when we were kids. Then, when we grow up, we know that Santa was a wonderful invention to make kids happy at Christmas. We don’t “believe” in him anymore.

Buddhism is not about following beliefs. It is about a proven method of alleviating suffering, both mental and physical.
Believing that everyone will eventually become enlightened is just one more statement saying, “I’m not sure but this guy sounds good so I’ll go with what he says.” That time is necessary to be enlightened.

The Soul is already enlightened, for it is not time-bound. It is eternal and doesn’t have a beginning, a middle, and an end. That is what defines the Soul, as opposed to all the other things that come and go, including our bodies. Finding our way back to our Soul and deep inner peace has nothing to do with hoping (believing) that someone is right because it makes us feel better about where humanity is going.

There is no end to enlightenment, as there is no end to Source Energy of the Universe. It is always Now. It’s not like we have to work our way into heaven. Our Souls are already there. So to “believe” that everyone will go to a heaven of enlightenment is a nice fairy tale to adhere to, but enlightenment has nothing to do with believing what other people say or any religious system that will supposedly get us there.